Sunday, September 30, 2012


THE TRUE LIFE BIO OF THE FICTITIOUS TODD WILKINS OF "SWEET VALLEY:" A LIFE by Dane Youssef The tall, dark and especially handsome (as well as surprisingly intellectual) popular, neo-jock (basketball, football, there are others) and final fraternity member. Tawny-brown haired and matching amber-chestnut eyes. The boy looks like the proverbial boy-next-door. But he's more than that. Todd Wilkins is the poly-typical boilerplate ideal high-school dreamboat. Yup. Every girl's fantasy... Elizabeth's long-time on-again, off-again boyfriend. In the grand tradition of many--such as Sam & Diane, Ross & Rachel, J.D. & Elliot, etc. Elizabeth first met Todd in Kindergarten when he was crying because his mother had left there at a real school. She felt for him and tried to give him a tissue, but he just threw it away. Liz asks now, "Was that a sign right there?" Todd was initially romantically pursued by both the Wakefield twins. But in the end, he just always seems more interested in Elizabeth as they just have more in common. They begin steadily dating in "Double Love". And from thereon in, things go in every possible direction. He shares many of Liz's intellectual interests and pursuits. He himself is a real catch--Damn it, a scholar and an athlete. They break up when Todd and his family move to Vermont, and Todd eventually becomes romantically involved with the terminally ill Suzanne. On Todd's return to Sweet Valley, Todd and Elizabeth reunite. They re-unite only to break up all over again over Elizabeth's infidelity and later involvement with Devon Whitelaw at the end of Sweet Valley High, but reunite at the beginning of Sweet Valley University, only to break up again when Elizabeth won't go to bed with him. Todd later finds solace in the arms of Liz's long-time B.F.F. Enid Rollins. The two lose their virginity together and find sanctuary within each other. Liz and Todd are constantly breaking up and getting back together as well as committing infidelity. Of all the strong points Elizabeth Wakefield has, one of her especially large faults is how continuously unfaithful she is. Liz commits infidelity on Todd several times. And there are more than just a few times where Todd does return the favor. He fools around with other women--including once even with a supermodel while he's discovered and asked to model at a magazine Liz just happens to be working at. Jessica herself had aspirations for her and Todd. They themselves made time together. Once while Elizabeth was arrested and being allegedly convicted for an offense that Jess herself was guilty of. And again while Liz and Todd themselves were separated. Jessica tells of the entire liaison in her second diary. When they've gotten back together, Liz is horrified to find out Todd's been having a recurring affair with Jess on-and-off for a while--while Jess has been married to a very rich man! And poor, poor Liz finally finds out only after all the wedding plans she's made... for herself and Todd. According to Sweet Valley Confidential, Todd eventually marries Jessica and they have a son, Jake. Todd himself, like his first love Liz is somewhat into journalism. No, not the important kind. He becomes a sports-writer. That's right, the "toy department." He eventually lands himself a successful job as a sports editorialist and his column is picked up by several papers. Todd and Jessica have a brief falling-out and separation. And as you've all probably guessed, they committed adultery with other people at the time. But eventually the big confusing misunderstanding is cleared up and the two re-unite, declaring their undying love for each other... and the desire to stay together forever and ever. Todd and Jessica--the ones who were really meant to be. After all that... who would've guessed? Well, credit the Sovereign of "Sweet Valley" Almighty Herself Ms. Francine Pascal who put them together for good in her ten-year Confidential reunion. She saw something in them together. An odd match. But in the strangest way... it just seems to make the most sense of all. As for our subject, our hero... Mr. Todd Wilkins. His story is still being written... by a lot of different people. --For Our Hero, Both Our Heroines and All of "The Valley," Dane Youssef